Saturday, January 10, 2009

The Default Hot Chick

I've noticed in certain social situations a phenomenon that I've come to label as the Default Hot Chick Situation.

In this day and age of gender equality, one thing perhaps has yet to be addressed: the fact that guys want to take their clothes off and rub against chicks. Or dudes, I guess. But I can only speak from experience here, and I haven't had a whole lot of dude-rubbing urges. At least not lately.

The way the Default Hot Chick situation works is thus: In any situation there are bound to be some participants of the female variety. By nature, one of these females are to be perceived as more attractive than others. That female becomes, through no fault of her own, the Default Hot Chick. I suppose some Sociologists could have field day with these assertions. (Since I'm a sociological layman, I can only hope that there are countless tomes already penned in this vein.)

For instance: Where I cemented this theory was a job I had straight out of college. Three women worked in this place, two of which were in their fifties, one of which was almost as equally wide as she was tall. (She was very short, and worked in the basement, where the ceiling barely cleared my head) The other Cinco-genarian wore enough perfume to be recognized from 15 feet away with one's eyes closed.

The Default Hot Chick (or DHC, as she will henceforth be known) was in her mid-20's, not unattractive, yet not really a stunner. And yet I found myself wildly drawn to her. Not in an inappropriate sense. I'm a professional, and can separate my job from my throbbing biological urges. (Oh there is a huge story to illustrate this last bit forthcoming) But nevertheless, she was the only show in town, as it were.

I don't mean to be a jerk in writing this. I'm not a "Bro". I'm merely setting up, through an anecdote from my adultivity, an experience from when I was a pre-pubescent pup, and the weirdness that can grip a boy, or a man, and can make him act in irrational, sometimes comically bizarre fashion. More to follow.

No comments: